this is a project for english we have to write a short story starting with a paragraph from an egar allen poe story. the first paragraph is from edgar allen poes the tell tale heart. please tell me if i need to improve anything and enjoy

"True! Nervous very,very dreadfully nervous I had been and am; but why WILL you say that I am mad? The disease had sharpened my senses, not destroyed, not dulled them. Above all was the sense of hearing acute. I heard all things in heaven and earth. I heard many things in hell. How then am I mad? Hearken! And observe how healthily, how calmly I tell you the whole story."
"When was I well? Even in my newfound state of clarity I cannot completely recall the time when I was well. I do however remember a time when the daily activities were not as deranged as they are now. It would be a very less than this that I shall describe to you; I was young, but my exact age I can tell you not. I need not make my mind cluttered and filled with such superfluous details. A man whose soul was black waited to be ended. People fought and yelled and pushed and shoved to see the sharp steel end the man's life. But even though his life was nearing the end he didn't twitch, didn't express fear or pain or torment. He just waited. I noticed something irregular about him but I could not quite grasp it as he looked away as to hide his face. He did not do this in shame no I think it was something more."
"As he drudged to his final rest I strived to determine what peculiarity attracted my attention suddenly I saw his head lift turn slightly. He was fully focused on me. I realize now what had drawn my attention before as I stared at him I saw his mouth. Five leather stitches bound his mouth shut. He was asked for his last words when I suddenly saw his face contort. His mouth ripped open he looked at me and let out a terrifying laughed. A laugh so inhuman it could hardly be distinguished as having any fathom of a meaning to any person who was right of mind. His eyes shot open and the steel fell. The beast's features froze in the morbid pose of his final cry. His laugh still piercing my ears I could not move. I was paralyzed there for what seemed like a century. As I struggled to move the beast remained in my memory I could still hear his terrible laugh scratching in my head trying to scrape its way out!"
"And there I remained unmoving. In silence, only the beast and myself remained I saw the man and his face stared at me from the point as I stared at him. I waitited for some soul to rescue me from his unmoving stare but this hope was empty. I began to ponder if people even knew if I was there. I wonderes if i had deceased the moment that the blade fell; pondered if I had ever had been living at all as I watched I began to hear a slight noise. Like an insect had flown to close to my ear. I focused hard and listened, holding my breath as to make the most minimal amount of noise. It became more distinct at my realization of what I had been detecting my blood ran cold. I hear the undeniable sound of the beasts laugh."
"The sinister cackle began to grow in volume it terrified me immensely. His eyes seemed to peirce my skin and judge the very content of my soul. It was as though the the beasts piercing start had wrapped itself around my throat squeezing every drop of life out of me. I was near my demise. When I felt a sudden warmth as the heat returned to my blood. I realized the source of the warmth was a hand on rested on my shoulder. I could move again! The beasts paralyzing stare no longer had control around me. I turned around and saw you; my savoir and I am no longer trapped with his piercing eyes. Please look at me so I may see the person to whom I owe my life." I saw his head lift turn slightly. He was fully focused on me. I saw his mouth. Five leather stitches bound his mouth shut. I suddenly saw his face contort. His mouth ripped open he looked at me and laughed